The Big Bang Theory Wiki

"Cause I’m gonna miss you, Shelly-bean, even though you creep the bejeezus out of me." Mary Cooper

"Where No Sheldon Has Gone Before" was a short fan novella based on Star Trek: The Original Series, and a fan fiction story (written by Sheldon) depicting, when Spock takes Sheldon (who was then 10-years-old at the time he wrote it) from his home on the 'Backwoods of East Texas' to the 23rd Century to help the Crew of the USS Enterprise (NCC-1701) save the galaxy. Sheldon also converts the first 5th of the novella into the first act of a play as part of his acting lessons from Penny; however, when he portrayed his mother, Mary and tried to act emotional for the scene where 10-year-old Sheldon left for the 23rd Century, it caused Sheldon to actually emotionally break down into sobs. Due to this, Penny has to tell his mother that she "broke her son". Sheldon then tells his mother "Mommy, I love you! Don't let Spock take me to the future!"


Scene: East Texas. A warm summer night. A woman, Mary, stands on her porch. In the distance, we hear a lonesome train whistle ("Whoo, whoo!"). Droning buzz of cicadas ("zzzzzz"). A coyote howls at the moon, frightening sensitive young boys everywhere ("ow ow owwww!"). Out in the woods, a owl screeches ("hoo!").

Mary: Shelly, Shelly! How many times have I told you not to leave your science-y stuff out on the porch. Goodness. I'll never understand that boy. But then again, I'm a religious nut, and my mind is closed to so many things.

(Spock beams down and materializes.)

Spock: Spock to Enterprise. Transport successful.

Mary: Glory be to heaven! Some sort of creature just manifested out of thin air. George, put down that Pepsi can full of bourbon, it ain't fooling anyone, and get your shotgun!

Spock: Greetings, Mary Cooper. I am Spock.

Mary: Oh my! Your sudden appearance startles me!

Spock: We have been monitoring your son Sheldon from the 23rd century and we have determined that he is now ready to join us. His unique genius is our best hope to bringing peace to a vast and troubled galaxy.

Mary: I understand. Oh, Shelly, a man's here to take you away to the future! Be sure to pack clean underwear!

Sheldon: Mommy, why are you crying?

Mary: ‘Cause I’m gonna miss you, Shelly-bean, even though you creep the bejeezus out of me.

Sheldon: Well I’m sorry. It’s not my fault. I’m just incredibly smart, and everyone around here is dumber than a bag of rocks.

Mary: Oh, now, don’t you start crying. You get in that spaceship. Mommy’s late for Indian bingo.


Used in the acting lessons which Penny gave Sheldon in "The Thespian Catalyst" episode.