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The bullet went right through you.

Leonard Hofstadter starts writing a novel In "The Novelization Correlation" about a scientist that solves mysteries. The story takes place at the CERN Large Hadron Collider lab in Switzerland. The story goes through variations as the gang alternatively propose different models for the CERN supervisor Ilsa. Finally Leonard gives up writing entirely because he is a physicist and not an author.

Various scenes

Scene 1: (Penny as Ilsa)

A group of professionals are in a lab at the CERN Swiss facility. Logan looked at the stunning woman who was his boss and said, “It's murder.”

Ilsa replied, “Figure that out yourself, genius?”

Logan replied, “Okay, no need to be snarky.”

Ilsa looks at him suspiciously, “Who would want to kill him?”

Logan looks around the room. “Could be anyone. Dr. Silvers. [Howard look-alike] Dr. Prekash. Raj with a goatee] Hans the janitor. [Stuart with a big mustache] But the door is locked, so it has to be someone in this room.”

“Wow, you are on fire,” snaps Ilsa walking away. Scene 2 (Bernadette Alternative):

Logan tells everyone, “But the door is locked, so it has to be someone in this room.”

“Wow, you are on fire,” snaps Ilsa walking away. [Bernadette]

Scene 3 (Bernadette Alternative Continued):

Logan continues with his analysis. “Each one of you had a motive.”

Dr. Silvers asks, “Who died and made you detective?"

Logan points to the dead body, “He did.”

“I think you’re neglecting your own motive, a massive inferiority complex,” snaps back Ilsa.

“It’s not massive. Just average size,” replies Logan less confidently.

Hans the janitor breaks in, “I don’t mean to interrupt, but somebody’s tracking blood everywhere so – never mind, it’s me.”

Dr. Prekash says, “You say we’re all suspects.”

“How do we know you’re not the killer?” asks Dr. Silver to Logan.

“I have an alibi.”

Ilsa snaps at him, “Yeah, he’s not smart enough to pull off a murder like this.”

Scene 4: (Penny as Ilsa)

Logan is lying against a desk wounded.

Ilsa observes, “It looks like the bullet went straight through you. Damn it, Logan. When are you gonna stop?”

Logan replies, “I didn’t get my PhD in quitting.”

“You’re a physicist. What makes you think you can solve a crime?” asks Ilsa.

“He’s losing a lot of blood,” remarks Dr. Silver.

“Great. I’m gonna have to clean that up!” complains Hans.

Dr. Prekash suggests, “You know, a little soda water might get that right out.”

Dr. Silver pleads, “We’ve got to find some bandages.”

Ilsa shouts, “No. There’s no time,” as she tears off her sleeve placing the cloth on Logan's shoulder. “Does it hurt?”

“Everything you do hurts,” Logan replies.

“Then why do you keep coming back for more?” she asks.

Scene 5: (Beverly Alternative):

Ilsa leans over the wounded Logan. [Beverly}

“You’re a physicist. What makes you think you can solve a crime,” asks Ilsa.

Back: Leonard leaves his mother as she again corrects his grammar. He runs over to Penny to tell her that she was writing about his mother, not his wife. Penny then imagines the story.

Scene 6 (Beverly Alternative Continued):

“I think you’re neglecting your own motive, a massive inferiority complex,” snaps back Ilsa. [Beverly]

“It’s not massive. Just average size,” replies Logan less confidently...

[Later] Dr. Silver pleads, “We’ve got to find some bandages.”

Ilsa [Beverly] shouts, “No. There’s no time,” as she tears off her sleeve placing the cloth on Logan's shoulder. “Does it hurt?”

“Everything you do hurts,” Logan replies.

“Then why do you keep coming back for more?” she asks.

Logan admits, “M..maybe, I do.”

Scenes from Leonard's Novel


Who shot Logan???

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