Transcripts/The Big Bran Hypothesis

 Scene: Sheldon and Leonard’s apartment. Sheldon, Leonard, Howard and Raj are present.

 Leonard: There you go, Pad Thai, no peanuts.

 Howard: But does it have peanut oil?

 Leonard: Uh, I’m not sure, everyone keep an eye on Howard in case he starts to swell up.

 Sheldon: Since it’s not bee season, you can have my epinephrine.

 Raj: Are there any chopsticks?

 Sheldon: You don’t need chopsticks, this is Thai food.

 Leonard: Here we go.

 Sheldon: Thailand has had the fork since the latter half of the nineteenth century. Interestingly they don’t actually put the fork in their mouth, they use it to put the food on a spoon which then goes into their mouth.

 Leonard: Ask him for a napkin, I dare you. (There is a knock on the door.) I’ll get it.

 Howard: Do I look puffy? I feel puffy.

 (Leonard opens door to Penny, steps into hallway)

 Penny: Hey Leonard.

 Leonard: Oh, hi Penny.

 Penny: Am I interrupting.

 Leonard: No.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon (off): You’re not swelling, Howard.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard (off): No, no, look at my fingers, they’re like Vienna sausages.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Sounds like you have company.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: They’re not going anywhere. (Closes door, staying in hallway.) So, you’re coming home from work. That’s great. How was work.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Well, you know, it’s the Cheesecake Factory. People order cheesecake, and I bring it to them.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: So, you sort of act as a carbohydrate delivery system.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Yeah, call it whatever you want, I get minimum wage. Yeah, anyways, I was wondering if you could help me out with something, I was….

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Yes.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Oh. Okay, great, I’m having some furniture delivered tomorrow, and I may not be here, so…. (apartment door opens, Sheldon, Raj and Howard appear) Oh! Hel…hello!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: (speaks a phrase in Russian).

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: I’m sorry?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Haven’t you ever been told how beautiful you are in flawless Russian?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: No, I haven’t.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Get used to it.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Yeah, I probably won’t, but… Hey Sheldon.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Hi.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Hey Raj! (Raj looks uncomfortable) Still not talking to me, huh?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Don’t take it personally, it’s his pathology, he can’t talk to women.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: He can’t talk to attractive women, or in your case a cheesecake–scented Goddess!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: So, there’s gonna be some furniture delivered?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Yeah, yeah, if it gets here and I’m not here tomorrow could you just sign for it and have them put it in my apartment.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Yeah, no problem.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Great, here’s my spare key. Thank you.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Penny, wait.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Yeah?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Um, if you don’t have any other plans, do you want to join us for Thai food and a Superman movie marathon?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: A marathon? Wow, how many Superman movies are there?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: You’re kidding, right?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Yeah, I do like the one where Lois Lane falls from the helicopter and Superman swooshes down and catches her, which one was that?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard,Sheldon and Howard together: One. (Raj raises one finger).

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: You realise that scene was rife with scientific inaccuracy.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Yes, I know, men can’t fly.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Oh no, let’s assume that they can. Lois Lane is falling, accelerating at an initial rate of 32 feet per second per second. Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel. Miss Lane, who is now travelling at approximately 120 miles per hour, hits them, and is immediately sliced into three equal pieces.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Unless, Superman matches her speed and decelerates.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: In what space, sir, in what space? She’s two feet above the ground. Frankly, if he really loved her, he’d let her hit the pavement. It would be a more merciful death.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Excuse me, your entire argument is predicated on the assumption that Superman’s flight is a feat of strength.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Are you listening to yourself, it is well established that Superman’s flight is a feat of strength, it is an extension of his ability to leap tall buildings, an ability he derives from Earth’s yellow Sun.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Yeah, and you don’t have a problem with that, how does he fly at night.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Uh, a combination of the moon’s solar reflection and the energy storage capacity of Kryptonian skin cells.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: I’m just going to go wash up.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: I have 26 hundred comic books in there, I challenge you to find a single reference to Kryptonian skin cells.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Challenge accepted. (Tries door.) We’re locked out.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj: Also, the pretty girl left.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; ">  Credit sequence.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: Ground floor hallway of the apartment building. Leonard is signing for the delivery.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Okay, her apartment’s on the fourth floor but the elevator’s broken so you’re going to have to (delivery man leaves) oh, you’re just going to be done, okay, cool, thanks. I guess we’ll just bring it up ourselves.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I hardly think so.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Why not?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Well, we don’t have a dolly, or lifting belts, or any measurable upper body strength.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: We don’t need strength, we’re physicists. We are the intellectual descendents of Archimedes. Give me a fulcrum and a lever and I can move the Earth, it’s just a matter…(starts to move package) I don’t have this… I don’t have this I don’t have this.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Archimedes would be so proud.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Do you have any ideas?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Yes, but they all involve a green lantern and a power ring.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Time shift, Leonard and Sheldon are now lowering the package onto the bottom of the stairs.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Easy, easy (package falls) Okay! Now we’ve got an inclined plane. The force required to lift is reduced by the sine of the angle of the stairs, call it thirty degrees, so about half.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Exactly half.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard (snarkily): Exactly half. Let’s push. Okay, see, it’s moving, this is easy, all in the math.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: What’s your formula for the corner.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: What? Oh, okay, uh, okay, yeah, no problem, just come up here and help me pull and turn.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> (Sheldon heads up the stairs. The package slides back down to the bottom.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Ah, gravity, thou art a heartless bitch.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Time shift, they now have the package on an upstairs hallway, not their own.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of you having sexual congress with this woman?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Men do things for women without expecting sex.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Yeah, those are men who just had sex.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: I’m doing this to be a good neighbour. In any case, there’s no way it could lower the odds.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Quick cut to the hallway of their floor, they are nearing the top of the staircase.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Almost there, almost there, almost there. (Lets go of package, it starts to slip down)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: No we’re not, no we’re not, no we’re not.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: Inside Penny’s apartment. They are laying the package down on the floor.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Watch your fingers. Watch your fingers. Oh God, my fingers!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: You okay?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: No, it hurt…(looking around) Great Caesar’s Ghost, look at this place?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: So Penny’s a little messy.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: A little messy? The Mandelbrot set of complex numbers is a little messy, this is chaos. Excuse me, explain to me an organisational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid. I’m just inferring that this is a couch, because the evidence suggests the coffee table’s having a tiny garage sale.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Did it ever occur to you that not everyone has the compulsive need to sort, organise and label the entire world around them?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: No.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Well they don’t. Hard as it may be for you to believe, most people don’t sort their breakfast cereal numerically by fibre content.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Excuse me, but I think we’ve both found that helpful at times.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Come on, we should go.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Hang on.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: What are you doing?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Straightening up.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Sheldon, this is not your home.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: This is not anyone’s home, this is a swirling vortex of entropy.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: When the transvestite lived here, you didn’t care how he kept the place.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Because it was immaculate, I mean, you open that man’s closet, it was left to right, evening gowns, cocktail dresses, then his police uniforms.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: What were you doing in his closet?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I helped run some cable for a webcam.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny (entering): Hey guys.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Oh, hey Penny, this just arrived, we just brought this up, just now.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Great. Was it hard getting it up the stairs?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: (sucks in breath)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: No.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: No?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: No.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: No.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Well, we’ll get out of your hair.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Oh, great, thank you again (she throws her jacket over the back of the sofa).

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Penny, I just want you to know that, you don’t have to live like this. I’m here for you.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: What’s he talking about?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: It’s a joke.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: I don’t get it.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Yeah, he didn’t tell it right.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: Leonard’s bedroom, he is asleep. Sound of door opening and closing somewhere else is heard. Leonard wakes, puts on his glasses and looks at the clock. It is 2:16.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Sheldon?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: The living room. Leonard enters carrying a light sabre.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Sheldon? Hello?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> (Notices front door is open, turns off light sabre.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: Penny’s apartment, penny is sleeping, Sheldon is cleaning. Leonard enters.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Sheldon!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Sssshhhh! Penny’s sleeping.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Are you insane, you can’t just break into a woman’s apartment in the middle of the night and clean.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I had no choice. I couldn’t sleep knowing that just outside my bedroom was our living room, and just outside our living room was that hallway, and immediately adjacent to that hallway was… this.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Do you realise that if Penny wakes up, there is no reasonable explanation as to why we’re here?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I just gave you a reasonable explanation.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: No, no. You gave me an explanation, it’s reasonableness will be determined by a jury of your peers.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Don’t be ridiculous. I have no peers.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Sheldon, we have to get out of here.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> (Penny snores)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: You might want to speak in a lower register.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: What?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Evolution has made women sensitive to high pitched noises while they sleep, so that they’ll be roused by a crying baby. If you want to avoid waking her, speak in a lower register.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: That’s ridiculous. (Penny snores again.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: No, (lowering his voice dramatically,) that’s ridiculous.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard (doing likewise): Fine. I accept your premise, now please let’s go.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I am not leaving until I’m done.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: O-o-o-oh! (Collapses against wall).

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: If you have time to lean, you have time to clean.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Oh, what the hell.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: Sheldon and Leonard’s living room, morning. Sheldon enters, singing to himself.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Morning.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Morning.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I have to say, I slept splendidly. Granted, not long, but just deeply and well.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: I’m not surprised. A well known folk cure for insomnia is to break into your neighbour’s apartment and clean.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Sarcasm?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: You think?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Granted, my methods may have been somewhat unorthodox, but I think the end result will be a measurable enhancement of Penny’s quality of life.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: You know what, you’ve convinced me, maybe tonight we should sneak in and shampoo her carpet.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: You don’t think that crosses a line?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Yes! For God’s sake, Sheldon, do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: You have a sarcasm sign?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: No, I do not have a sarcasm sign.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Do you want some cereal. I’m feeling so good today I’m going to choose from the low fibre end of the shelf. Hello, Honey Puffs.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny (voice off): Son of a Bitch!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Penny’s up.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny (voice off): You sick, geeky bastards!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: How did she know it was us?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I may have left a suggested organisational schematic for her bedroom closet.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny (voice off): Leonard!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: God, this is going to be bad.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Goodbye, Honey Puffs, hello Big Bran.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny (entering): You came into my apartment last night when I was sleeping?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Yes, but, only to clean.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Really more to organise, you’re not actually dirty, per se.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Give me back my key.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: I’m very, very sorry.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Do you understand how creepy this is.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Oh, yes, we discussed it at length last night.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: In my apartment, while I was sleeping.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: And snoring. And that’s probably just a sinus infection, but it could be sleep apnoea, you might want to see an otolaryngologist. It’s a throat doctor.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: And what kind of doctor removes shoes from asses?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Depending on the depth, that’s either a proctologist or a general surgeon.(Leonard holds up a sign reading “Sarcasm”) Oh!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: God!

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Okay, look, no Penny, I think what you’re feeling is perfectly valid, and maybe a little bit later today when you’re feeling a little bit less, for lack of a better word, violated, maybe we could talk about this some more.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Stay away from me.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Sure, that’s another way to go.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Penny, Penny, just to clarify because there will be a discussion when you leave, is your objection solely to our presence in the apartment while you were sleeping, or do you also object to the imposition of a new organisational paradigm. (Penny stares in disbelief, then leaves.) Well that was a little non-responsive.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: You are going to march yourself over there right now and apologise. (Sheldon laughs.) What’s funny?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: That wasn’t sarcasm?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: No.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Wooh, boy, you are all over the place this morning. (Knocks on Penny’s door.) I have a masters and two PhD’s, I should not have to do this.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny (opening door): What?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: I am truly sorry for what happened last night, I take full responsibility. And I hope that it won’t colour your opinion of Leonard, who is not only a wonderful guy, but also, I hear, a gentle and thorough lover. (Penny closes door in his face.) I did what I could.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: The stairwell. Raj is coming up the stairs, he meets Penny who is going down.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Hey Raj. (Raj stands looking uncomfortable.) Hey, listen, I don’t know if you heard about what happened last night with Leonard and Sheldon, but I’m really upset about it, I mean they just, they let themselves into my place, and then they cleaned it, I mean can you even believe that? How weird is that?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj (internally, while Penny continues to talk): Ooh, she’s standing very close to me. Oh my, she does smell good. What is that, vanilla?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: You know, where I come from, someone comes into your house at night, you shoot, okay? And you don’t shoot to wound. I mean, alright, my sister shot her husband, but it was an accident, they were drunk. What was I saying?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj (internally): She’s so chatty. Maybe my parents are right. Maybe I’d be better off with an Indian girl. We’d have the same cultural background, and my wife would sing to my children the same lullabies my mother sang to me.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: It’s obvious that they meant well, but I’m just, I’m having a really rough time, like I said, I broke up with my boyfriend, and it’s just freaking me out.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj (internally sings an Indian lullaby.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: I mean, just because most of the men I’ve known in my life happen to be jerks, doesn’t mean I should just assume Leonard and Sheldon are. Right?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj (internally): She asked me a question. I should probably nod. (Does.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: That’s exactly what I thought. Thank you for listening. You’re a doll. (She hugs him.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj (internally): Oh-oh. Turn your pelvis. (Does.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: Sheldon and Leonard’s living room. Howard is there, playing on a dance video game.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard (jumping off game mat): Grab a napkin, homie. You just got served.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: It’s fine. You win.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: What’s his problem?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: His imaginary girlfriend broke up with him.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Been there.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj (entering): Hello. Sorry I’m late. But I was in the hallway, chatting up Penny.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Really? You? Rajesh Koothrapali, spoke to Penny?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj: Actually, I was less the chatter than the chattee.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: What did she say? Is she still mad at me?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj: Well, she was upset at first, but, probably because her sister shot somebody. Then there was something about you and… then she hugged me.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: She hugged you? How did she hug you? (Raj hugs Howard.) Is that her perfume I smell?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Raj: intoxicating, isn’t it?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: The hallway, Leonard puts a note under Penny’s door. It opens.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Hi.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Oh.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: What’s going on?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Um, here’s the thing. (Reads from note.) Penny. Just as Oppenheimer came to regret his contributions to the first atomic bomb, so too I regret my participation in what was, at the very least, an error in judgement. The hallmark of the great human experiment is the willingness to recognise one’s mistakes. Some mistakes, such as Madame Curie’s discovery of Radium turned out to have great scientific potential even though she would later die a slow, painful death from radiation poisoning. Another example, from the field of ebola research….

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Leonard.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Yeah.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny (hugs him): We’re okay. (Kisses him on cheek. Closes door. Leonard looks happy, walks back across hallway and straight into the apartment door.)

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Scene: Penny’s apartment. Sheldon and Leonard are trying to construct furniture.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Six two inch dowels.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Check.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: One package, Phillips head screws.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Check.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Guys, seriously, I grew up on a farm, okay, I rebuilt a tractor engine when I was like twelve, I think I can put together a cheap Swedish media centre.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: No, please, we insist, it’s the least we can do considering.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Considering what? How great this place looks?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard (across room with Raj): Oh boy, I was afraid of this.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: What?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: These instructions are a pictographic representation of the least imaginative way to assemble these components. This right here is why Sweden has no space program.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Well, uh, it looked pretty good in the store.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: It is an inefficient design, for example Penny has a flat screen TV, which means all the space behind it is wasted.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: We could put her stereo back there.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: And control it how?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Run an infra-red repeater, photocell here, emitter here, easy peasy.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard (after Raj whispers in his ear): Good point, how you gonna cool it?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Hey guys, I got this.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Hang on Penny. How about fans, here and here?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Also inefficient, and might be loud.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: How about liquid coolant? Maybe a little aquarium pump here, run some quarter inch PVC…

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Guys, this is actually really simple.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Hold on, honey, men at work. The PVC comes down here, maybe a little corrugated sheet metal as a radiator here.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Oh, really, show me where we put a drip tray, a sluice and an overflow reservoir?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: And if water is involved we’re going to have to ground the crap out of the thing.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Guys, it’s hot in here, I think I’ll just take off all my clothes.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Oh, I’ve got it. How about if we replace panels A, B and F and crossbar H with aircraft grade aluminium.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Sheldon: Right, then the entire thing’s one big heat sink.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Perfect, Leonard, why don’t you and Sheldon go down to the junk yard and pick up about six square metres of scrap aluminium, Raj and I will run down to my lab and get the oxy-acetaline torch.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Meet back here in an hour?

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Howard: Done.

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Leonard: Got it. (They all leave).

<p style="line-height: 1.5em; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; background-color: rgb(22, 20, 16); margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 10pt; "> Penny: Okay, this place does look pretty good.